New MOOD by Onnit

He’s old and crusty and corny but she is still with him anyways

  • Permalink pipes I need some help with a girlfriend of mine. She's 25 years old and she is dating a man who is 55 years old. They met at work and he is way up in the company so he of course makes a lot more money than her and that's the only reason she's with him. She says he pulls down close to a million a year. Now I know it's not 10 million but still... Now my girlfriend is super attractive and she says that he can hardly get it up and that his pipes don't work the way they would if he was much younger. And yes he takes Viagra and all but not all the time. I met him and he is super corny with some lame ass jokes. I just think she is throwing her life away for this guy and I want to save her before it's too late. This too shall pass pumpkin. Dr.S">Gallery

    He’s old and crusty and corny but she is still with him anyways

I need some help with a girlfriend of mine. She’s 25 years old and she is dating a man who is 55 years old. They met at work and he is way up in the company so he of course makes a lot more money than her and that’s the only reason she’s with him. She says he pulls down close to a million a year. Now I know it’s not 10 million but still… Now my girlfriend is super attractive and she says that he can hardly get it up and that his pipes don’t work the way they would if he was much younger. And yes he takes Viagra and all but not all the time. I met him and he is super corny with some lame ass jokes. I just think she is throwing her life away for this guy and I want to save her before it’s too late.

This too shall pass pumpkin. Dr.S

She told me she’s hot enough that she can get away with anything

  • Permalink text I am lucky to be smashing a hottie here in Cali. I tell her she shouldn't text and drive and she says she's hot enough that she can get away with anything. Luckily she usually texts when we are at stop lights but sometimes she does on the highway when we are doing like 70. She doesn't keep her eyes on the road and is more interested in her I Phone. I have been lucky so far but I am seriously concerned that her luck might run out soon and we might go careening off a cliff somewhere and end up dead. Should I just take the phone from her if she does it again? Show her who is the boss already. Dr.S ">Gallery

    She told me she’s hot enough that she can get away with anything

I am lucky to be smashing a hottie here in Cali. I tell her she shouldn’t text and drive and she says she’s hot enough that she can get away with anything. Luckily she usually texts when we are at stop lights but sometimes she does on the highway when we are doing like 70. She doesn’t keep her eyes on the road and is more interested in her I Phone. I have been lucky so far but I am seriously concerned that her luck might run out soon and we might go careening off a cliff somewhere and end up dead. Should I just take the phone from her if she does it again?

Show her who is the boss already. Dr.S

The struggle is kind of real for us and it stinks

  • Permalink icecubes Both me and my girl are trying to make ends meet here in the Cleveland area. We are good people and just squeaking by with ice dinners and I didn't mean NICE dinners. We don't have enough $$$ for fancy trips or nice cars or extra threads. We are also not jealous of those who have everything either. We are just hoping things get better in the future. My girl is preggers and is in her first trimester and believe it or not we are still having nasty sex and most of it is anal so don't worry we are not injuring the baby at all. If you don't have hope in this life you have nothing. Right Dr.S?!!! I would put some mustard on it for sure. Dr.S ">Gallery

    The struggle is kind of real for us and it stinks

Both me and my girl are trying to make ends meet here in the Cleveland area. We are good people and just squeaking by with ice dinners and I didn’t mean NICE dinners. We don’t have enough $$$ for fancy trips or nice cars or extra threads. We are also not jealous of those who have everything either. We are just hoping things get better in the future. My girl is preggers and is in her first trimester and believe it or not we are still having nasty sex and most of it is anal so don’t worry we are not injuring the baby at all. If you don’t have hope in this life you have nothing. Right Dr.S?!!!

I would put some mustard on it for sure. Dr.S

A hot chick told my friend he has the face of a molester

  • Permalink car Dr.S PLEASE comfort my friend. A hottie who I know had a few drinks in her the other night and kind of said something crazy very loud. She was like "Your friend kind of has the face of a molester" and she didn't mean for him to hear it but he did and honestly didn't even attack back. Anyways my friend is devastated and has been feeling very low and I am just trying to cheer him up. He says he is going on long drives after what she said to him just to clear his mind and not to think about the comment but it is hard for him to push from his mind. Is there anything you can say to help him? I'm so sick of hot chicks ruining average lives. Dr.S">Gallery

    A hot chick told my friend he has the face of a molester

Dr.S PLEASE comfort my friend. A hottie who I know had a few drinks in her the other night and kind of said something crazy very loud. She was like “Your friend kind of has the face of a molester” and she didn’t mean for him to hear it but he did and honestly didn’t even attack back. Anyways my friend is devastated and has been feeling very low and I am just trying to cheer him up. He says he is going on long drives after what she said to him just to clear his mind and not to think about the comment but it is hard for him to push from his mind. Is there anything you can say to help him?

I’m so sick of hot chicks ruining average lives. Dr.S

I will only go after a perfect ten because I am not a loser

  • Permalink flawless Dr.S I don't get how there are some dudes out there with low standards chasing chubby girls and really big ones. Honestly makes no sense to me and they seem like total losers just trying for anything they can get. Life is too short to settle. Now I have been lucky and have a great job and from what girls tell me "I'm very sexy" so when I chase a ten more often than not I can close the deal. I mean I do have to put the work in but still usually I can get the girl no matter how hot she is. I guess what I am saying is that there is no chick out there totally out of my league. No good fortune lasts forever friend. Dr.S">Gallery

    I will only go after a perfect ten because I am not a loser

Dr.S I don’t get how there are some dudes out there with low standards chasing chubby girls and really big ones. Honestly makes no sense to me and they seem like total losers just trying for anything they can get. Life is too short to settle. Now I have been lucky and have a great job and from what girls tell me “I’m very sexy” so when I chase a ten more often than not I can close the deal. I mean I do have to put the work in but still usually I can get the girl no matter how hot she is. I guess what I am saying is that there is no chick out there totally out of my league.

No good fortune lasts forever friend. Dr.S

Help me decide between a sober slam pig or a raging alcoholic hottie

  • Permalink booze Dr.S I am torn and 29 years of age. I know 2 girls who are pretty dope. One is a sober slam pig and what I mean is that she is pushing 190 but a real cool person but loves to eat. The other girl is super smoking hot with a banging bod and also very cool (when she is sober not wasted). I like them both but I can only have one in this world. I am not a polygamist and have no intentions of being one. Which one should I pick? I am guessing that both would pass the sniff test but it's just a guess honestly. The raging one will ruin your life in 5 years. Dr.S ">Gallery

    Help me decide between a sober slam pig or a raging alcoholic hottie

Dr.S I am torn and 29 years of age. I know 2 girls who are pretty dope. One is a sober slam pig and what I mean is that she is pushing 190 but a real cool person but loves to eat. The other girl is super smoking hot with a banging bod and also very cool (when she is sober not wasted). I like them both but I can only have one in this world. I am not a polygamist and have no intentions of being one. Which one should I pick? I am guessing that both would pass the sniff test but it’s just a guess honestly.

The raging one will ruin your life in 5 years. Dr.S

I banged 7.5 girls this summer and would like to brag about it

  • Permalink summer Dr.S I am sad to see summer end. I had a pretty good summer and just came here to brag. I railed the crap out of 7.5 girls this summer. I'm saying .5 because there was this real small chick almost like a midget and I don't know if she was one but I was rolling hard on Molly and ended up spinning her around and smashing her pretty hard in my buddy's basement behind an old washing machine. Kind of stinks when summer ends ya know because I am on the east coast and it's going to get cold in a few weeks then when the snow comes I get depressed as all hell. Last summer I only slept with 3 girls so I doubled it this summer of '15 and went back door on 2 also. Please pat me on the back. Stink Nation rules! Your back door numbers need an extra push obviously. Dr.S ">Gallery

    I banged 7.5 girls this summer and would like to brag about it

Dr.S I am sad to see summer end. I had a pretty good summer and just came here to brag. I railed the crap out of 7.5 girls this summer. I’m saying .5 because there was this real small chick almost like a midget and I don’t know if she was one but I was rolling hard on Molly and ended up spinning her around and smashing her pretty hard in my buddy’s basement behind an old washing machine. Kind of stinks when summer ends ya know because I am on the east coast and it’s going to get cold in a few weeks then when the snow comes I get depressed as all hell. Last summer I only slept with 3 girls so I doubled it this summer of ’15 and went back door on 2 also. Please pat me on the back. Stink Nation rules!

Your back door numbers need an extra push obviously. Dr.S

I wasn’t planning on anal on a Monday night but it just happened

  • Permalink netflix This guy I met from a friend at work I have been seeing for almost 3 weeks now. I have a 5 date rule before I go back to a guy's apartment. Well the 5 date rule was up and he knew about it and asked me over to watch Netflix and I said yes. We had some wine and he made some appetizers which were pretty solid actually. One thing led to another and we opened another bottle and then we had sex and probably because I had so much wine in me I agreed to anal. I typically would never do such a thing but he was pretty sure of himself that we should try it and it wasn't all that bad. Just goes to show that all rules are meant to be broken. Right? The 5 date rule sounds pretty stupid actually. Dr.S">Gallery

    I wasn’t planning on anal on a Monday night but it just happened

This guy I met from a friend at work I have been seeing for almost 3 weeks now. I have a 5 date rule before I go back to a guy’s apartment. Well the 5 date rule was up and he knew about it and asked me over to watch Netflix and I said yes. We had some wine and he made some appetizers which were pretty solid actually. One thing led to another and we opened another bottle and then we had sex and probably because I had so much wine in me I agreed to anal. I typically would never do such a thing but he was pretty sure of himself that we should try it and it wasn’t all that bad. Just goes to show that all rules are meant to be broken. Right?

The 5 date rule sounds pretty stupid actually. Dr.S

If her oven is nasty then her starfish will most likely be a mess also

  • Permalink oven Dr.S I learned from a good friend of mine who passed away in 2011 from cancer. He always told me to pay attention to a hot chick's apartment. Watch and see if it is tidy. Look at the floors and check the bathroom and most importantly take a peek in her oven to see if it is clean or not. Those were his dying words to me. God bless his soul. I did not heed his last bit of advice and paid the price dearly. I smashed a total dime piece Friday night and well when I was hitting it from behind the light from the ceiling fan showed me a starfish that was all nasty and brown and kind of crusty actually. When she went into the bathroom I slipped away and opened her oven and this is what I saw. It was like my friend from heaven was talking to me saying I told you so about the mess. So let this be a lesson to all dudes out there banging the crap out of hotties. Make sure you get a good glimpse of that oven before you tackle the starfish. It will reveal everything you should know before so you can save yourself the pain. PEACE. Everyone knows this already but it's worth repeating I guess. Dr.S ">Gallery

    If her oven is nasty then her starfish will most likely be a mess also

Dr.S I learned from a good friend of mine who passed away in 2011 from cancer. He always told me to pay attention to a hot chick’s apartment. Watch and see if it is tidy. Look at the floors and check the bathroom and most importantly take a peek in her oven to see if it is clean or not. Those were his dying words to me. God bless his soul. I did not heed his last bit of advice and paid the price dearly. I smashed a total dime piece Friday night and well when I was hitting it from behind the light from the ceiling fan showed me a starfish that was all nasty and brown and kind of crusty actually. When she went into the bathroom I slipped away and opened her oven and this is what I saw. It was like my friend from heaven was talking to me saying I told you so about the mess. So let this be a lesson to all dudes out there banging the crap out of hotties. Make sure you get a good glimpse of that oven before you tackle the starfish. It will reveal everything you should know before so you can save yourself the pain. PEACE.

Everyone knows this already but it’s worth repeating I guess. Dr.S

I found out that my best friend banged my sister in my pool

  • Permalink pool When I was out at the mall shopping for some new sunglasses I found out that my best friend who I have known since 5th grade was at my house banging my sister in the deep end of my pool. I don't know what to do about it Dr.S. He was bragging about it to another guy I know and when I confronted him about it he said he in fact did it raw dog and she might even be pregnant and he was laughing about it. My sister is 19 and I am 24 so she can make her own decisions but still I want to beat the living crap out of him but probably won't. I hope you bought polarized shades. Dr.S">Gallery

    I found out that my best friend banged my sister in my pool

When I was out at the mall shopping for some new sunglasses I found out that my best friend who I have known since 5th grade was at my house banging my sister in the deep end of my pool. I don’t know what to do about it Dr.S. He was bragging about it to another guy I know and when I confronted him about it he said he in fact did it raw dog and she might even be pregnant and he was laughing about it. My sister is 19 and I am 24 so she can make her own decisions but still I want to beat the living crap out of him but probably won’t.

I hope you bought polarized shades. Dr.S

She’s down for whatever as long as I show up with her favorite beer

  • Permalink redstripe I have a pretty cool girl. She's not a slam pig or a gold digger by any means. Just a sweet cool girl who likes smoking blunts and drinking beer with me. As long as I bring her favorite beer which happens to be Red Stripe she lets me do anything and I mean anything to her. I'm not one to go into details but let's just say my wish is her command and she has an amazing ass which I do enjoy plowing. I am the envy of all my friends and wouldn't have it any other way. Typically I am scoring while they are out at the clubs trying to grind with chicks and usually they end up going home ordering a few pizzas and then whacking off together. As long as she doesn't quote Marilyn Monroe you're set up for life. Dr.S ">Gallery

    She’s down for whatever as long as I show up with her favorite beer

I have a pretty cool girl. She’s not a slam pig or a gold digger by any means. Just a sweet cool girl who likes smoking blunts and drinking beer with me. As long as I bring her favorite beer which happens to be Red Stripe she lets me do anything and I mean anything to her. I’m not one to go into details but let’s just say my wish is her command and she has an amazing ass which I do enjoy plowing. I am the envy of all my friends and wouldn’t have it any other way. Typically I am scoring while they are out at the clubs trying to grind with chicks and usually they end up going home ordering a few pizzas and then whacking off together.

As long as she doesn’t quote Marilyn Monroe you’re set up for life. Dr.S

We split the check but she was still down for anal sex

  • Permalink money I met a real cute girl from a friend of a friend at work. I had been talking to her for about 2 weeks before we agreed to meet for an early dinner. We went to this little Vietnamese place near both of us and long story short when the check came she was like "I always like to pay half on the first date." Well I was down with that. The date didn't end there and we went out for some drinks and I ended up taking her home that night and she gave it up on my living room couch. Crazy thing was that she was like "I've never tried anal before but you're so damn good looking I'm willing to give it a whirl." That's all I needed to hear. I feel bad for ugly dudes out there trying to get laid. I have been blessed with good looks so I don't have to work as hard as uglier guys. If I had to go through what some ugly dudes do to get laid I would probably kill myself. Just being honest. By the way I went in raw dog in both holes and nothing bad happened so far. Keep up the good fight! Ugly dudes have no shot at anything in 2015. Dr.S">Gallery

    We split the check but she was still down for anal sex

I met a real cute girl from a friend of a friend at work. I had been talking to her for about 2 weeks before we agreed to meet for an early dinner. We went to this little Vietnamese place near both of us and long story short when the check came she was like “I always like to pay half on the first date.” Well I was down with that. The date didn’t end there and we went out for some drinks and I ended up taking her home that night and she gave it up on my living room couch. Crazy thing was that she was like “I’ve never tried anal before but you’re so damn good looking I’m willing to give it a whirl.” That’s all I needed to hear. I feel bad for ugly dudes out there trying to get laid. I have been blessed with good looks so I don’t have to work as hard as uglier guys. If I had to go through what some ugly dudes do to get laid I would probably kill myself. Just being honest. By the way I went in raw dog in both holes and nothing bad happened so far. Keep up the good fight!

Ugly dudes have no shot at anything in 2015. Dr.S

I think I have discovered some flawless ones

  • Permalink flawlessFksimdJOGJ47qf95gUwr5ZRWxSdio= Big fan of the stinky! Finally found some flawless ones and wanted to share them with the world. Don't know who she is and could care less actually. Would you take her to Applebee's for happy hour? Probably but she might not be single. Dr.S">Gallery

    I think I have discovered some flawless ones

Big fan of the stinky! Finally found some flawless ones and wanted to share them with the world. Don’t know who she is and could care less actually. Would you take her to Applebee’s for happy hour?

Probably but she might not be single. Dr.S

She told me she had the red river on our first date

  • Permalink period I took a girl out I met online to a pub near my apartment here in Cleveland. Well she was totally cute and into me and we probably had at least 5 drinks each. I did the typical move of inviting her back to watch a movie and then things were heating up. I got her naked and all then when I was about bang the crap out of her she covered herself and said she had her period. I believed her but she went a step further and showed me the tampon thread sticking out of her. She was like I normally don't have sex on the first date anyways so it's probably for the best. I did hit it a week later so there is a happy ending I guess and it was tight and passed the sniff test. I'm actually really into her so we will see where things go. Good luck son. Dr.S">Gallery

    She told me she had the red river on our first date

I took a girl out I met online to a pub near my apartment here in Cleveland. Well she was totally cute and into me and we probably had at least 5 drinks each. I did the typical move of inviting her back to watch a movie and then things were heating up. I got her naked and all then when I was about bang the crap out of her she covered herself and said she had her period. I believed her but she went a step further and showed me the tampon thread sticking out of her. She was like I normally don’t have sex on the first date anyways so it’s probably for the best. I did hit it a week later so there is a happy ending I guess and it was tight and passed the sniff test. I’m actually really into her so we will see where things go.

Good luck son. Dr.S

I walked in on my cute roommate getting drilled from behind

  • Permalink door I thought I was playing my cards right. I really wanted my roommate bad and I'm pretty sure she knew it but I was kind of in the friend zone because she's probably an average 8 and I'm just kind of below average in the looks department. I try to play it cool all the time but nothing really happened but was hoping. There are 4 of us in this house and the other day I came home from work at 3 to get something to eat and I heard the cat scratching at the door so I went up there to let it out. And when I did my roommate was getting stuffed from behind and she was yelling "CLOSE the F$#$#ing door!" and I did. The crazy part is that she wasn't even moaning or anything. I couldn't believe it and I went into my room and immediately tugged off. It's been awkward ever since and she said it was some random guy on Tinder she met a week ago. I am also guilty of sniffing her panties but please don't publish that and she didn't pass the sniff test by the way. The last sentence wrecks everything. Dr.S ">Gallery

    I walked in on my cute roommate getting drilled from behind

I thought I was playing my cards right. I really wanted my roommate bad and I’m pretty sure she knew it but I was kind of in the friend zone because she’s probably an average 8 and I’m just kind of below average in the looks department. I try to play it cool all the time but nothing really happened but was hoping. There are 4 of us in this house and the other day I came home from work at 3 to get something to eat and I heard the cat scratching at the door so I went up there to let it out. And when I did my roommate was getting stuffed from behind and she was yelling “CLOSE the F$#$#ing door!” and I did. The crazy part is that she wasn’t even moaning or anything. I couldn’t believe it and I went into my room and immediately tugged off. It’s been awkward ever since and she said it was some random guy on Tinder she met a week ago. I am also guilty of sniffing her panties but please don’t publish that and she didn’t pass the sniff test by the way.

The last sentence wrecks everything. Dr.S

It doesn’t matter that my good looking friend is stuck in 2006

  • Permalink edhardy Dr.S I have a good looking friend. All the ladies swarm him when we are out at the bars or clubs. I am left sometimes alone watching because I am 5'8" and am kind of chubby while he is over 6 feet and the ladies say he is built like Michael Phelps. Here's the funny thing. My friend dresses with Ed Hardy and kind of looks like a page from 2006 but the ladies don't care because he's good looking and sleep with him anyways. I mean the dude could be wearing a dirty rug out and he would still get laid. Me on the other hand NOT so much. If he looks good the ladies won't even care if he has the herp. Dr.S ">Gallery

    It doesn’t matter that my good looking friend is stuck in 2006

Dr.S I have a good looking friend. All the ladies swarm him when we are out at the bars or clubs. I am left sometimes alone watching because I am 5’8″ and am kind of chubby while he is over 6 feet and the ladies say he is built like Michael Phelps. Here’s the funny thing. My friend dresses with Ed Hardy and kind of looks like a page from 2006 but the ladies don’t care because he’s good looking and sleep with him anyways. I mean the dude could be wearing a dirty rug out and he would still get laid. Me on the other hand NOT so much.

If he looks good the ladies won’t even care if he has the herp. Dr.S

Please evaluate these saggers on a scale of 1 to 10

  • Permalink saggers Dr.S I need your expert opinion. I have been a fan of The Stinky Nation for over a year now. A girl on Tinder texted me these saggers. She said she hasn't been laid in over a year and wants me to come over tonight so I can just hit it and quit it at my leisure. Just wondering if I should do the deed. I mean how would your highness rate these on a scale of 1 to 10? I would give a solid 3. A solid 3 is probably accurate so just get it over with already. Dr.S ">Gallery

    Please evaluate these saggers on a scale of 1 to 10

Dr.S I need your expert opinion. I have been a fan of The Stinky Nation for over a year now. A girl on Tinder texted me these saggers. She said she hasn’t been laid in over a year and wants me to come over tonight so I can just hit it and quit it at my leisure. Just wondering if I should do the deed. I mean how would your highness rate these on a scale of 1 to 10? I would give a solid 3.

A solid 3 is probably accurate so just get it over with already. Dr.S

How long should I put up with my psychologically repulsive hottie?

  • Permalink sunsettt I'm probably the typical dude. I have the car, the nice pad, and the hottie. Problem is I'm getting sick of her. Everything that comes out of her mouth is psychologically repulsive and I just kind of roll it but it's wearing on me and I find myself looking to get out of this relationship whatever it is. I am not a sugardaddy just a dude banging the crap out of your typical American hot chick. She loves the things that all hotties want like nice purses, shopping, and nice trips. We've done all of that and I'm sick of the high maintenance but she's so fine and the sex is great most guys would call me crazy for throwing in the towel. It's just I know there is something better out there. It's been 5 months. I don't think I have another 5 in me. The sun is setting on her Dr.S. I just feel it. You should give it a week then block her number. Dr.S ">Gallery

    How long should I put up with my psychologically repulsive hottie?

I’m probably the typical dude. I have the car, the nice pad, and the hottie. Problem is I’m getting sick of her. Everything that comes out of her mouth is psychologically repulsive and I just kind of roll it but it’s wearing on me and I find myself looking to get out of this relationship whatever it is. I am not a sugardaddy just a dude banging the crap out of your typical American hot chick. She loves the things that all hotties want like nice purses, shopping, and nice trips. We’ve done all of that and I’m sick of the high maintenance but she’s so fine and the sex is great most guys would call me crazy for throwing in the towel. It’s just I know there is something better out there. It’s been 5 months. I don’t think I have another 5 in me. The sun is setting on her Dr.S. I just feel it.

You should give it a week then block her number. Dr.S

She chews like a friggin pig but she’s hot so I don’t mind actually

  • Permalink burger Ever dated a girl who chews real loud? That's what I got going on here in Cali. I am a surfer guy and have a pretty good life here. Actually she picked me up when I was cleaning off on the boardwalk. She started asking me all kinds of surfing questions and you know the rest. A few days later I banged the crap out of her. 5 months have gone by. She's cool and all and I've even taught her how to surf but the one thing that annoys me is that she chews real loud like a friggin pig. I can hear her chewing from like 10 feet away. It's not good. I told her to stop chewing like that but she said that's how she was born with that kind of jaw muscle. Anyways if she wasn't smoking hot I would have said BYE FELICIA a long time ago. You hear me? It's typical how you would put up with anything just because it's tight. Dr.S ">Gallery

    She chews like a friggin pig but she’s hot so I don’t mind actually

Ever dated a girl who chews real loud? That’s what I got going on here in Cali. I am a surfer guy and have a pretty good life here. Actually she picked me up when I was cleaning off on the boardwalk. She started asking me all kinds of surfing questions and you know the rest. A few days later I banged the crap out of her. 5 months have gone by. She’s cool and all and I’ve even taught her how to surf but the one thing that annoys me is that she chews real loud like a friggin pig. I can hear her chewing from like 10 feet away. It’s not good. I told her to stop chewing like that but she said that’s how she was born with that kind of jaw muscle. Anyways if she wasn’t smoking hot I would have said BYE FELICIA a long time ago. You hear me?

It’s typical how you would put up with anything just because it’s tight. Dr.S

She got stoned and ate 4 huge slices of my masterpiece behind my back

  • Permalink strawberry My girlfriend started smoking dope a few months ago. I have never touched a drug in my life and don't intend to. I will be 26 next month so I don't see why I would start now. I found this out because I made a cake and in the morning when I woke up 4 slices were missing and nearly all the strawberries were gone. This is what it looked like before she devoured it like an animal. I am a chef by trade so I can make another one but that's not the point. The point is that she confessed that she is a chronic dope smoker and I just am afraid that it is the gateway drug and that I will come home one day and find her dead with a heroin needle sticking out of her arm. Am I overreacting? Confused in Ohio. I can't believe a girl would actually date you. Dr.S">Gallery

    She got stoned and ate 4 huge slices of my masterpiece behind my back

My girlfriend started smoking dope a few months ago. I have never touched a drug in my life and don’t intend to. I will be 26 next month so I don’t see why I would start now. I found this out because I made a cake and in the morning when I woke up 4 slices were missing and nearly all the strawberries were gone. This is what it looked like before she devoured it like an animal. I am a chef by trade so I can make another one but that’s not the point. The point is that she confessed that she is a chronic dope smoker and I just am afraid that it is the gateway drug and that I will come home one day and find her dead with a heroin needle sticking out of her arm. Am I overreacting? Confused in Ohio.

I can’t believe a girl would actually date you. Dr.S

He thought my superficial politeness meant I wanted to bang him

  • Permalink vodka Just because I am real sweet and pretty much nice to every guy doesn't mean I want to hop in bed with them. There is this guy who chats me up every time I am at mail box at my apartment complex and I am polite just answering his questions and smiling. I am just nice to him but I would never date him or screw him for that matter because he's not my type at all. He just can't take the hint that I am not interested. Now he it is incredibly awkward sometimes when we both get home from work at the same time because I told him I had a boyfriend when he asked me to dinner. Small chat doesn't mean I want to bang him! Geez!!! You should have given the chump a shot at it at least. Dr.S">Gallery

    He thought my superficial politeness meant I wanted to bang him

Just because I am real sweet and pretty much nice to every guy doesn’t mean I want to hop in bed with them. There is this guy who chats me up every time I am at mail box at my apartment complex and I am polite just answering his questions and smiling. I am just nice to him but I would never date him or screw him for that matter because he’s not my type at all. He just can’t take the hint that I am not interested. Now he it is incredibly awkward sometimes when we both get home from work at the same time because I told him I had a boyfriend when he asked me to dinner. Small chat doesn’t mean I want to bang him! Geez!!!

You should have given the chump a shot at it at least. Dr.S