New MOOD by Onnit

I’ve been stuck inside all winter and it stinks

  • Permalink X7tWxq38ge1oEdv8DDBedxhU4Z3CvUZ9aBOfgcH23_I= Dr.S I live in the northeast. Pretty much been freezing here for the entire month. I can't believe how far away summer is and I can't wait for it. I love going to the beach and chasing girls up here all summer long. My buddy has a beach house and we usually each smash at least 5 chicks a piece during the 4 weeks we are up there. I feel like summer will never come tho. What do you think of her greasy thighs? I think they are too heavy personally. Dr.S">Gallery

    I’ve been stuck inside all winter and it stinks

Dr.S I live in the northeast. Pretty much been freezing here for the entire month. I can’t believe how far away summer is and I can’t wait for it. I love going to the beach and chasing girls up here all summer long. My buddy has a beach house and we usually each smash at least 5 chicks a piece during the 4 weeks we are up there. I feel like summer will never come tho. What do you think of her greasy thighs?

I think they are too heavy personally. Dr.S

My friend got hit by a truck on Friday the 13th

  • Permalink IMG954876(1) Dr.S please pray for my friend. We were both drinking hard a couple of weeks ago and he stepped into street and got nailed by a truck and broke both of his legs. He is coherent so he will make it. Talk about your bad string of luck. Dude had just lost his job then gets hit by a small truck. I don't think it could get much worse unless maybe he got diagnosed with the herp. That stinks and sending good energy his way. Dr.S">Gallery

    My friend got hit by a truck on Friday the 13th

Dr.S please pray for my friend. We were both drinking hard a couple of weeks ago and he stepped into street and got nailed by a truck and broke both of his legs. He is coherent so he will make it. Talk about your bad string of luck. Dude had just lost his job then gets hit by a small truck. I don’t think it could get much worse unless maybe he got diagnosed with the herp.

That stinks and sending good energy his way. Dr.S

I drove home from work because I left raunchy porn on her computer

  • Permalink IMAG1496 Dr.S this was me rotting in traffic during rush hour so I could race home to close this raunchy butt hole site I found online where these chicks were getting pounded in their starfish. My girlfriend would be devastated and I knew she had a break from work that day and usually comes back to the apartment to let her lab Susie out to do her business. I couldn't let her see that I was surfing that site. It would be probably be over between us. I am happy to report I got back to her place in the nick of time and was just 20 mins late to work. I saved the relationship and that's all that matters. Close Call indeed. She will never know your dark secrets. Dr.S ">Gallery

    I drove home from work because I left raunchy porn on her computer

Dr.S this was me rotting in traffic during rush hour so I could race home to close this raunchy butt hole site I found online where these chicks were getting pounded in their starfish. My girlfriend would be devastated and I knew she had a break from work that day and usually comes back to the apartment to let her lab Susie out to do her business. I couldn’t let her see that I was surfing that site. It would be probably be over between us. I am happy to report I got back to her place in the nick of time and was just 20 mins late to work. I saved the relationship and that’s all that matters. Close Call indeed.

She will never know your dark secrets. Dr.S

I have not seen better flawless ones than these ones

  • Permalink Screen-Shot-2015-03-06-at-1.18.41-PM Dr.S these are flawless. I don't think I have seen a better pair in my entire 26 years. Do you agree? Should I ask her out to Applebee's? Yes and pick up the check at least. Dr.S">Gallery

    I have not seen better flawless ones than these ones

Dr.S these are flawless. I don’t think I have seen a better pair in my entire 26 years. Do you agree? Should I ask her out to Applebee’s?

Yes and pick up the check at least. Dr.S

She was glowing before she crapped our bed

  • Permalink bed20150320_100709_959 Dr.S I have a wife with a bun in the oven. She is due in 2 months. Well I made a pasta dish the other night and I guess it didn't agree with her. I guess the Alfredo sauce made her queasy. Well everyone is saying how glowing she is including me. Well in the middle of the night last week I was awoken by an awful stench. She crapped our bed in her sleep and I really almost threw up but quickly held it back. There is a stain under here and I haven't had time to get new sheets but we did wash them in case you were wondering. Just go to Macy's and buy a higher thread count to absorb any future stench. Dr.S">Gallery

    She was glowing before she crapped our bed

Dr.S I have a wife with a bun in the oven. She is due in 2 months. Well I made a pasta dish the other night and I guess it didn’t agree with her. I guess the Alfredo sauce made her queasy. Well everyone is saying how glowing she is including me. Well in the middle of the night last week I was awoken by an awful stench. She crapped our bed in her sleep and I really almost threw up but quickly held it back. There is a stain under here and I haven’t had time to get new sheets but we did wash them in case you were wondering.

Just go to Macy’s and buy a higher thread count to absorb any future stench. Dr.S

She’s a hottie who still tears the crusts off her bread

  • Permalink crusts I'm dating a hot chick and it doesn't stink by the way. She annoys the crap out of me some times and the only reason I put up with it is well because her ass is tight as a snare drum if you know what that is. If not please use Google. Anyway she has this annoying habit of tearing the crusts off all the bread and then putting it back in the bag such that I can't make a sandwich the normal way. Should I be concerned or just put up with it because it's tight? Lost and confused in Canada. Just put up with it and be grateful that she's not a bbw. Dr.S ">Gallery

    She’s a hottie who still tears the crusts off her bread

I’m dating a hot chick and it doesn’t stink by the way. She annoys the crap out of me some times and the only reason I put up with it is well because her ass is tight as a snare drum if you know what that is. If not please use Google. Anyway she has this annoying habit of tearing the crusts off all the bread and then putting it back in the bag such that I can’t make a sandwich the normal way. Should I be concerned or just put up with it because it’s tight? Lost and confused in Canada.

Just put up with it and be grateful that she’s not a bbw. Dr.S

I married a former cutter and sometimes it stinks

  • Permalink IMG_20150317_103806_404 I've been married for almost 5 years. We are both 33. My wife was a cutter when she was a teenager and sometimes she has flashbacks and will have nightmares and break out in sweats. We have tried all sorts of things to exorcise these demons but nothing has worked really. She said that when she was younger she would sit on her bed and just cut herself all over her arms and it went on a long time before her parents got her the help she needed. It stinks that she still have nightmares about it and I guess our past always catches up with us in some ways Dr.S. Love the site by the way and she has no odor down south if you were wondering. I'm glad once a cutter always a cutter is not true. Dr.S">Gallery

    I married a former cutter and sometimes it stinks

I’ve been married for almost 5 years. We are both 33. My wife was a cutter when she was a teenager and sometimes she has flashbacks and will have nightmares and break out in sweats. We have tried all sorts of things to exorcise these demons but nothing has worked really. She said that when she was younger she would sit on her bed and just cut herself all over her arms and it went on a long time before her parents got her the help she needed. It stinks that she still have nightmares about it and I guess our past always catches up with us in some ways Dr.S. Love the site by the way and she has no odor down south if you were wondering.

I’m glad once a cutter always a cutter is not true. Dr.S

I whacked it to her tampon instructions and enjoyed it

  • Permalink IMG_20150316_101931_786 My sister has a hot friend who I am trying to bang. This weekend we were all hanging out for St. Patrick's day and I went into her bathroom and found her tampons. I casually sat on the toilet seat and whacked it to the instructions and then stole a tampon. This is what it looks like. I am here to confess Dr.S. Please have mercy on my soul. Disgusting and immoral on all levels. Dr.S ">Gallery

    I whacked it to her tampon instructions and enjoyed it

My sister has a hot friend who I am trying to bang. This weekend we were all hanging out for St. Patrick’s day and I went into her bathroom and found her tampons. I casually sat on the toilet seat and whacked it to the instructions and then stole a tampon. This is what it looks like. I am here to confess Dr.S. Please have mercy on my soul.

Disgusting and immoral on all levels. Dr.S

Is my friend a loser for hooking up with a NIT player?

  • Permalink IMG_20150315_193631_062 Dr.S I told my friend she is a loser for hooking up with a ball player for one of the teams that made the NIT. Am I right? I said she should at least hook up with a player who made it to the Big Dance and not some tourney for losers. She tell me she doesn't care about NIT vs. NCAA and she really likes him. I suspect she might be licking his taint and it makes me real sad. Who watches the NIT? Dr.S">Gallery

    Is my friend a loser for hooking up with a NIT player?

Dr.S I told my friend she is a loser for hooking up with a ball player for one of the teams that made the NIT. Am I right? I said she should at least hook up with a player who made it to the Big Dance and not some tourney for losers. She tell me she doesn’t care about NIT vs. NCAA and she really likes him. I suspect she might be licking his taint and it makes me real sad.

Who watches the NIT? Dr.S

Most of America looks like this now

  • Permalink 11043124_10153134227837287_3844529643640176905_n Dr.S couldn't stop laughing at this pic. Think it went viral. I live in a small town in the midwest and don't plan on moving anywhere to chase stupid hot chicks by the way. That view though. Dr.S">Gallery

    Most of America looks like this now

Dr.S couldn’t stop laughing at this pic. Think it went viral. I live in a small town in the midwest and don’t plan on moving anywhere to chase stupid hot chicks by the way.

That view though. Dr.S

My wife is a binge eater and it really disgusts me

  • Permalink IMG_20150301_214742_164 I have been married for 3 years. In that time my wife has started binge eating for at least the past year or so. When she does she can't stop and it disgusts me. Sometimes she pulls the trigger but sometimes not. She can seriously eat 2 banana splits then have a large french fry afterwards because she doesn't eat all day then opens the flood gates. I don't know what to do Dr.S because apparently it is a real condition so we shouldn't make fun of it. Any suggestions? Seek a real doctor for a proper evaluation. Dr.S">Gallery

    My wife is a binge eater and it really disgusts me

I have been married for 3 years. In that time my wife has started binge eating for at least the past year or so. When she does she can’t stop and it disgusts me. Sometimes she pulls the trigger but sometimes not. She can seriously eat 2 banana splits then have a large french fry afterwards because she doesn’t eat all day then opens the flood gates. I don’t know what to do Dr.S because apparently it is a real condition so we shouldn’t make fun of it. Any suggestions?

Seek a real doctor for a proper evaluation. Dr.S

I have been battling a huge demon since I got fired from my job

  • Permalink bud Dr.S I am a full blown alcoholic. I got fired nearly 1 year ago and fell into a huge depression and also started drinking heavily and used a lot of my unemployment checks for booze and basically have been wasted since I got canned. I was making well over 100 K and I did something shady so long story short I got clipped. My alcoholism has ruined me. I feel like complete garbage and hardly even leave my apartment. My savings are running out so I need to do something soon and clean up my act. I have been on several interviews but nothing has come through and I don't want to work for $9 an hour. I have a master's degree with a focus on accounting. The worst part about this is that I also lost my girlfriend and she was hot and I could care less about it. I know I will come out of it because no pain lasts forever. Right? Misery persists but can never stay forever. Dr.S ">Gallery

    I have been battling a huge demon since I got fired from my job

Dr.S I am a full blown alcoholic. I got fired nearly 1 year ago and fell into a huge depression and also started drinking heavily and used a lot of my unemployment checks for booze and basically have been wasted since I got canned. I was making well over 100 K and I did something shady so long story short I got clipped. My alcoholism has ruined me. I feel like complete garbage and hardly even leave my apartment. My savings are running out so I need to do something soon and clean up my act. I have been on several interviews but nothing has come through and I don’t want to work for $9 an hour. I have a master’s degree with a focus on accounting. The worst part about this is that I also lost my girlfriend and she was hot and I could care less about it. I know I will come out of it because no pain lasts forever. Right?

Misery persists but can never stay forever. Dr.S

I prefer beautiful eyes above anything else

  • Permalink Screen-Shottt-2015-03-09-at-5.34.31-PM I am a 30 year old man living in Manhattan. I just would like to say I prefer beautiful eyes on a girl above any other feature. I came across these beautiful brown eyes and I could stare at them all my life if she gave me a chance but the probability of us meeting is probably 1 in a billion. For all the dudes out there focusing on asses and boobs check yourself before you wreck yourself. Eyes are the windows to the soul. Dr.S">Gallery

    I prefer beautiful eyes above anything else

I am a 30 year old man living in Manhattan. I just would like to say I prefer beautiful eyes on a girl above any other feature. I came across these beautiful brown eyes and I could stare at them all my life if she gave me a chance but the probability of us meeting is probably 1 in a billion. For all the dudes out there focusing on asses and boobs check yourself before you wreck yourself.

Eyes are the windows to the soul. Dr.S

I switched from a cute vegan to a hottie who loves steak

  • Permalink hot Recently broke up with a cute vegan and went for a hottie who loves steak as much as I do who is a friend of a friend so we kind of got set up. I was so sick of her vegan way of life and her trying to impose it on me so I'm glad we are done. My new girlfriend is smoking hot around 130lbs and loves a good steak and we get one at least once a week. Also here clam canal has no funny odor. I just came here to say how happy I am. If you don't like something in your life just go out and change it! That looks dope. Dr.S ">Gallery

    I switched from a cute vegan to a hottie who loves steak

Recently broke up with a cute vegan and went for a hottie who loves steak as much as I do who is a friend of a friend so we kind of got set up. I was so sick of her vegan way of life and her trying to impose it on me so I’m glad we are done. My new girlfriend is smoking hot around 130lbs and loves a good steak and we get one at least once a week. Also here clam canal has no funny odor. I just came here to say how happy I am. If you don’t like something in your life just go out and change it!

That looks dope. Dr.S

New England’s championships don’t make up for its disgusting women

  • Permalink boston Hey Dr.S. I'm a LA guy here who is fan of the site. I was recently on the east coast for business and spent a couple of weeks in Boston. Well I will tell you I was super unimpressed. I don't think I saw one attractive girl my entire time there and the ones I did were on the larger side. Now I don't know if it was the cold or what but I saw some real nasty ones. Have you ever been there? Between the traffic and the girls I don't know which is worst. It's nice the Patriots won but Brady can't turn all the ugly dogs pretty up there! Brady can do no wrong so leave him out of this. Dr.S ">Gallery

    New England’s championships don’t make up for its disgusting women

Hey Dr.S. I’m a LA guy here who is fan of the site. I was recently on the east coast for business and spent a couple of weeks in Boston. Well I will tell you I was super unimpressed. I don’t think I saw one attractive girl my entire time there and the ones I did were on the larger side. Now I don’t know if it was the cold or what but I saw some real nasty ones. Have you ever been there? Between the traffic and the girls I don’t know which is worst. It’s nice the Patriots won but Brady can’t turn all the ugly dogs pretty up there!

Brady can do no wrong so leave him out of this. Dr.S

I made her a nice meal and still couldn’t close the deal

  • Permalink IMG_4789 Why are American women so stupid? I am a Middle Eastern man who prepared a nice meal for a girl I met here in New York as you can see here. It was our 5th date and I thought by doing this I would be able to get sex but she said it was too soon. I am not a rapist by any means but what does she want? I take her out and buy her a few nice things and now bring her into my home and still no sex after I take time to make us both a meal. Just because you treat her nice doesn't mean you can stick it in. Dr.S">Gallery

    I made her a nice meal and still couldn’t close the deal

Why are American women so stupid? I am a Middle Eastern man who prepared a nice meal for a girl I met here in New York as you can see here. It was our 5th date and I thought by doing this I would be able to get sex but she said it was too soon. I am not a rapist by any means but what does she want? I take her out and buy her a few nice things and now bring her into my home and still no sex after I take time to make us both a meal.

Just because you treat her nice doesn’t mean you can stick it in. Dr.S

Which person would you take to Applebee’s?

  • Permalink Screen-Shotttt-2015-02-26-at-1.54.37-PM Who would you take to Applebee's on Friday night? You can only take one and not both so who is it? The person wearing the leopard top. Dr.S">Gallery

    Which person would you take to Applebee’s?

Who would you take to Applebee’s on Friday night? You can only take one and not both so who is it?

The person wearing the leopard top. Dr.S

My wife’s weight fluctuates too much and it stinks

  • Permalink IMAG1590 Dr.S I have been married for almost 8 years now and we live in Arizona. My wife has had weight issues the entire time we've been together. She has recently gained back the 50 pounds she had lost over the last few years. When we are out at the pool I can tell guys are staring at her ass and thunder thighs when she gets out of the pool. I don't know what to do because and she tells me she is sick of fighting an uphill battle with weight. Should we move to a colder climate where weight is embraced and not noticed as much? Just stay put and keep fighting the blubber. Dr.S ">Gallery

    My wife’s weight fluctuates too much and it stinks

Dr.S I have been married for almost 8 years now and we live in Arizona. My wife has had weight issues the entire time we’ve been together. She has recently gained back the 50 pounds she had lost over the last few years. When we are out at the pool I can tell guys are staring at her ass and thunder thighs when she gets out of the pool. I don’t know what to do because and she tells me she is sick of fighting an uphill battle with weight. Should we move to a colder climate where weight is embraced and not noticed as much?

Just stay put and keep fighting the blubber. Dr.S

It’s been 10 years since she was struck by lightening

  • Permalink storm Dr.S 10 years ago my fiance was struck by lightening and killed. You would think the chance of lightening killing you is one in a billion but in my case I lost my fiance. We were both out on the golf course and didn't heed the warning and continued playing. I watched her die in front of me holding a 9 iron and I have been to countless therapists to help me. I want to say that the stinky helps me in some way. It brings a strange humor that nourishes my spirit and makes me whole again. God bless you. We all need to laugh so thank you. Dr.S ">Gallery

    It’s been 10 years since she was struck by lightening

Dr.S 10 years ago my fiance was struck by lightening and killed. You would think the chance of lightening killing you is one in a billion but in my case I lost my fiance. We were both out on the golf course and didn’t heed the warning and continued playing. I watched her die in front of me holding a 9 iron and I have been to countless therapists to help me. I want to say that the stinky helps me in some way. It brings a strange humor that nourishes my spirit and makes me whole again. God bless you.

We all need to laugh so thank you. Dr.S

My wife crapped the bed while giving birth to my son

  • Permalink IMG_20150305_074157_252 I am the proud father of a baby boy named Michael who is 6 weeks old. I just would like to say that my wife crapped the bed so hard while giving birth I had to leave the room because of the stench and missed a bit of my son's birth. Let that be a lesson to all men out there that your woman may crap herself while pushing out your kid from her ax wound. I know I am not the only victim. Sounds horrendous but congrats I guess. Dr.S">Gallery

    My wife crapped the bed while giving birth to my son

I am the proud father of a baby boy named Michael who is 6 weeks old. I just would like to say that my wife crapped the bed so hard while giving birth I had to leave the room because of the stench and missed a bit of my son’s birth. Let that be a lesson to all men out there that your woman may crap herself while pushing out your kid from her ax wound. I know I am not the only victim.

Sounds horrendous but congrats I guess. Dr.S

Why do hot girls make two pictures of themselves all the time?

  • Permalink 10952709_645323525613039_1745291515_n-480x480 Ladies we really only need one picture of you no matter how hot you are. We can see everything we need to see in one picture so doing two just defeats the purpose and doesn't make you any hotter. Just saying and thx for reading. Agreed. Dr.S">Gallery

    Why do hot girls make two pictures of themselves all the time?

Ladies we really only need one picture of you no matter how hot you are. We can see everything we need to see in one picture so doing two just defeats the purpose and doesn’t make you any hotter. Just saying and thx for reading.

Agreed. Dr.S